We can all agree that the current crop of reality television is the lowest of the lowest common denominator. Rather than simply scrapping the lot, here are some commonsense repurposings for existing shows:

Celebrity Big Brother.
The life of everyday citizens is monitored for anti-government sentiment by D list celebrities via reverse televisual technology

Deal Or No Deal
What terrible political outcomes will Tony Abbott barter to country senators for their support in destroying the country? Tune in this week to find out!

The X Factor
Mockumentary following the hilarious antics of people living in the fallout of Fukushima

America’s Got Talent
Hard-hitting documentary series detailing just how much global instability has resulted from U.S. imperialism over the 20th and 21st centuries

Series follows average minimum-wage worker in the United States

Watch unarmed black teens and adults get shot! New storylines every week!

The Biggest Loser
23 minutes of a silver reflective surface

Australia’s Next Top Model
How will climate change affect the liveable regions of this continent? We seriously don’t know, but here’s our best guess for where you’ll need to be in 2050!

The Amazing Race
4 part series documenting the history and possible future of eugenics

The Farmer Wants A Wife/Border Security
In this groundbreaking series crossover we give refugees the option of imprisonment on Manus Island, or marrying men in country towns – the results may surprise you!

Shark Tank
You will laugh and cry as you watch a succession of Western Australian political figures who called for the ‘shark cull’ enter a one-on-one battle to the death with an endangered species and easy political target.

My Restaurant Rules
Can an eatery lead a socialist revolution? Watch and find out!